“Before you start your journey, know your destination.”
~ Bikram Choudhury
Yes, I am now a certified Bikram Yoga teacher and am wondering if I just experienced 9 weeks of hell with a modern day Guru. Would a real guru in my lifetime live in Beverly Hills, own 40 Rolls-Royces and Bentleys and mingle with professional athletes, movie stars, and musicians? Be a self proclaimed guru to the rich & famous? Is the guy crazy? Absolutely! Bikram is a ruthless businessman and self-promoter and he knows how to work a room full of politicians and celebrities…from every angle…training 800+ new teachers each year to carry his message around the world. Would a ‘real’ guru says things like this to his students during lecture and yoga classes:
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“Suck your stomach in. I see many fat, flabby, hanging over stomach. I hate hanging…. Oh you guys have dirty mind. I talk about stomach, ass, you think something else.”
“My yoga is supposed to be hard. That’s why I call it ‘Bikram’s Torture Chamber’. Here you kill yourself. If you unlucky, you don’t die.”
“What time is it? I can’t read the time because of all the diamonds [on my watch].”
“Today I bought one shirt with your money. $139. Italian shirt. What, you think I want Pakistan shirt?”
“I sleep 2 hours per night. I don’t go to bed til the sun comes up. What is the biggest crime in life? Killing time.”
“You come to yoga with junk body, screw loose brain and lost soul”
“I hate fat and lazy people.”
“If I can do it, Statue of Liberty can do it. No problem. Every doctor in the world told me I would never walk again. Now I can stand on my head in lotus position all day.”
“This 9 weeks time will be the most valuable, precious, expensive time of your life.”
“This yoga help you fall in love with yourself. You will never find another human being who love himself as much as I love myself.”
“This yoga help you fall in love with yourself. You will never find another human being who love himself as much as I love myself.”
“It doesn’t matter what you have if you don’t know how to use it.”
“Dialogue MUST be EXACT! No dialogue, no yoga. No yoga, no money. No money, no honey.”
“You are born to give, not to get. Zero expectation – end of the day, you are winner.”
“I need a drink. (Bikram during class). This is not your time to drink. If you feel thirsty, look at me drinking water.”
“Continually push your fat ass beyond your flexibility.”… (You talking to me?)
“It’s like a melody, the way I put the sequence, medically, scientifically.”
“Suffering is my medicine.”
“Weight lifting give you only wheelchair. Sports give you mental hospital. And jail.”
“Weight lifting give you only wheelchair. Sports give you mental hospital. And jail.”
“Your mind supposed to be your friend, but because you don’t discipline it, your mind is your enemy.”
“Best food in the world is no food.”
“Who gave you the right, whatever the f&*# you call, you f&*##$% idiot, to put needle in your body.” [talking about tattoos]
“Best food in the world is no food.”
“Who gave you the right, whatever the f&*# you call, you f&*##$% idiot, to put needle in your body.” [talking about tattoos]
“Life is like a river, twisting and turning. No one can stop the river, nothing can stop it. If a rock or tree is in its way, river just turns in another direction. River takes another road.”
“When medical science stop, that’s when yoga science begin.”
“If you have the right key you can start the car in half a second. If you have the wrong key you will never start the car in hundred years.”
“I want spine backward bending. I don’t care how you do it. F&#* it. You can burp, you can fart, I don’t care. You can jump from window, but I want spine bending back!”
“From now on, those tops [bandeaux tops] are illegal in my class. In Bikram class all around the world, they are illegal. Put it on my website I want everyone to know. You constantly fussing, tugging, pulling, worried about little boob show. At least if it big boob come out it more interesting, that ok I don’t mind that.”
“I’m not going to tell you what you like to hear. I can’t tell you lie to make you happy.”
“I’m not going to tell you what you like to hear. I can’t tell you lie to make you happy.”
“If I learn better english then maybe I not be a yoga teacher. I become a politician. I am politician. I create politician.”
“Very flexible people are f*&^%$# stubborn because they have a fat ass and a fat brain.”
“If you die, is better, faster. You suffer less. But I introduce so many problems, you live 100 years longer.”
“You white people, Western country, are combination of cancer, gangrene and Aids.”
“I gave you goldmine key. I own goldmine. The key is yours. Do what you like with it.”
“I sell healthy life, good life, happy life. As long as you want it.”
“You’re doing pretty good. Actually, I brain wash you pretty good so far.”
“You’re doing pretty good. Actually, I brain wash you pretty good so far.”
Most of the world is fat and sick and unhealthy and f*&^#$ up.”
“Come down and push, push, push in the bush, and ass in the grass, and boys with the toys, you have an ant in your pant, come up stop in the middle.”
“Body is a temple. I give body a second name. You want to hear it? Body is a toilet. Everyday, 24 hours a day, you are shitting into your body. The whole world is shitting into it. You call food. That’s why once a day you have to flush it. Flush with Bikram yoga.”
“The worst thing in the world you can do, you call sports, I call mental masturbation. 3% physical exertion, 97% body destruction.”
“The beauty of yoga is, if you do posture 1% or 99%, as long as you do the right way you get 100% benefits. Yoga you don’t do, yoga you try.”
“The worst thing in the world you can do, you call sports, I call mental masturbation. 3% physical exertion, 97% body destruction.”
“The beauty of yoga is, if you do posture 1% or 99%, as long as you do the right way you get 100% benefits. Yoga you don’t do, yoga you try.”
“You beg me to come to your city to give lecture. I make $10,000 in 2 hours. I tell you how shit you are, how lazy you are, how fat you are, how stupid you are, how bad you are. All I do is put you in front of a cosmic mirror. Show you how ugly you are. You have fat ass and ugly hair. That’s my job. Best job in the world.”
“Never ever, no matter how bad they are, they in wheelchair, in coffin box, everybody have to lock the knee and grab the foot.”
“A bad man can teach english or science or mathematics. But a bad man cannot teach another bad man how to be good man.”
“Americans taught me, no pain no gain. In India we say, ‘No hell, no heaven.’”
“Get everyone’s name who did not read my book. They are not going to graduate tomorrow until they read my book tonight.”
“Did you know, a young man came from India at the age of 30. His name was Jesus Christ. Do you know his name?”
“Did you know, a young man came from India at the age of 30. His name was Jesus Christ. Do you know his name?”
“Can you believe it?”
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In America, entertainers are now considered guru’s by the younger generation. After going thru 9 weeks of training and practicing Bikram Yoga for 7 years, the answer from my perspective is ‘Yes’, this guy is a modern day, 65 year old Indian Guru, sporting a black speedo and long hair tied in a top knot who can motivate, intimidate, and inspire just about anyone at any age to practice Yoga to improve their life.
and yes, this training will help you with ‘knowing’…
“Self-realization is the knowing–in body, mind, and soul–that we are one with the omnipresence of God; that we do not have to pray that it comes to us, that we are not merely near it at all times, but that God’s omnipresence is our omnipresence; that we are just as much a part of Him now as we ever will be. All we have to do is improve our knowing.”
~ Paramahansa Yogananda
~ Paramahansa Yogananda
What’s the most important thing in your life? Your life! -Bikram Choudhury
